Setting Goals
We have rain that probably will be turning to snow as the temperature drops and we head on into the weekend. I can’t see the mountains, as they are blanketed in a gray mass that is slowly moving this way. It’s a good afternoon to snuggle up in the big stuffed chair by the wood stove, and do some relaxing. It’ll be a nice change of pace from my busy morning.
The old dog is already resting. She’s very smart when it comes to knowing when to relax and when to stress about something. I should take lessons from her. As we get a little older we sometimes forget that this “resting thing” becomes more important.
Before I settle into my big stuffed chair, and my resting mode, there is something that I want to bring up for discussion. Here it goes……
How much do you leave up to fate in regards to what your future holds for you? On the other hand, how much do you, or should you, influence your goals and take the proverbial “bull by the horns” to make that journey into your future happen?
I think that often opportunities are lost because too much is left up to fate. It makes me think of a rather laid-back family that we met while sailing in the South Pacific. These people lived each day to the fullest, they were fun loving almost to a fault, and they neglected the day to day maintenance of their sailboat. I can remember hearing them say that they were meant to be doing what they were doing, and that they would be taken care of because it just felt right. That is until they were shipwrecked, their boat sank, and they were stranded on a deserted island for 6 weeks without food and water. Alive, but was that really what fate had in mind for them?
All those who wander are not lost, but at some point in time they have to recognize that they have reached a destination. Making a new goal, striving towards it, and accomplishing it can be very rewarding. There is always something to look forward to, to strive toward, but I think that people need goals. Whether they are little short-term goals, or huge, life-altering goals it doesn’t really matter. Just make it something to plan for, work at, and keep your blood flowing!
Do you have any thoughts on fate vs. function and purpose?
The big stuffed chair is calling me. So here’s hoping that you have a fun-filled weekend packed with function and purpose!
Oh yes, I think about fate. I think some of my goals I've made in live had led me to where I am today.
ReplyDeleteToday my choices are about what is important to me in the 'right now' because I know that my time with certain loved ones are not forever.
My biggest goal is to find a fine balance for those important things in my life.
I too am cuddled on a chair with a favorite dog and a book [I did sign on to check blogs tho...]
I'm also mentally checking my short term goals ...tsk tsk.
Great question.
ReplyDeleteFate shouldn't mean that you shrug off repair and maintenance in your life. I couldn't live comfortably that way...not that I'm a control freak or anything, but there needs to be balance.
I need to have a goal. If I don't have a goal, I don't get anything done!
There are times I wonder if the choices I (we) made are right (like moving here, raising alfalfa, and having so many horses that I can't ride them all). I sometimes think we could do some of the things we used to enjoy if we weren't tied to this place (time wise and financially)...but then we absolutely love it here and don't want to be anywhere else.
Good question MJ!
ReplyDeleteI was always stunned by people who had big goals and who were driven enough to pursue them. But I wonder how many of them live such a happy and exciting life I get to live.
I never had big goals, I never had "drive", I always had dreams though.
Still have. Some of them became true (like visiting the US and making great friends for example!) and some I keep working on.
I guess it has to do with the way I grew up (or maybe it's in my genes).
Growing up under these circumstances (you know some of what I mean) made me live a "numb" life for a long time.
My parents didn't have goals, no one around me had I guess.
I would remember if they did. I know they had dreams, that's for sure.
I left a lot in my life to fate. I didn't know anything else.
Later, in my mid, late 20s I started to awake into a new dimension of my life, I started to discover who I was (still am every single day) and what I wanted for me to happen.
I did have short time goals which some of them I was able to achieve.
I had goals for my future.
With those also came fears for the future... not so nice. "What if I cannot get there" + "What if I fail?"...
It's been a long journey with lots of ups and downs.
Now, I will be turning 40 in little more then a year, I realize more and more that certain goals are a good thing, but they can also be an obstacle.
An obstacle into the NOW.
(I really like Val's thoughts on this subject!! )
I realize every single day, that if we don't live NOW, in this every moment, we don't live.
Of course I keep thinking of what I can do to keep the family and myself fed and warm, but only because I have to. It's a natural, we all have to do that.
I also think that the definition of a "goal" changes with aging.
(BTW: I wonder if the therm "goal" is something that attracts our EGO and if the therm "dream" is connected to our real ME's...)
When we are young, all we focus on is education, making money and finding our dream job.
Too often we get misled by thinking "success and money leads us to a happy life"...
As some of us get older we change and with it our way of thinking.
We get wiser and most of us have learned what it means to have success, to fail, to gain and to have lost.
For me I seem to have just one REAL goal left in life, and that is to grow spiritually.
I want to be able to stay present in all those situations I haven't been in the past.
I want to be able to be present, so I will not fall back into old patterns that didn't get me anywhere before and certainly will not get me anywhere now.
I KNOW that that's the only path that is paved with true happiness. I think of FATE to be my friend.
And every opportunity that will open up for me in the future I see as a gift.
I don't want to live in the future by setting goals, because my future does not exist yet.
So a goal is just something in my imagination.
Another question is, will I be happy when I reach my goal? Happier then I am now?
Well, one thing is for sure... when I meet one of those great opportunities ("the bull") that benefit me in some way, I will "take the bull by the horn" and make the best out of it.
As gtyyup said, "sometimes we wonder if the choices we make are right..........but then we love it here and don't want to be anywhere else."
♥ Micky
Wow! Some very nice reflecting. Thanks to all of you for your comments and thoughts!
ReplyDeleteYour post started something...and how wonderful it is...
ReplyDeleteI believe there are a couple of links to it.
Great job.
Remember. All roads lead home. No matter what you do or take it leads back to home if you want to go back.
ReplyDeleteCan you imagine what your neighbor's house would look like today if they had waited on the roof to actually leak before they plugged all the holes or put on a new roof. I remember as a child seeing this very handsome farm house with a beautifully landscaped yard and the house was spic and span and always looked freshly painted. The little creek that ran through the barn yard was kept neat as a pin.
Then the owners died or sold it. And the new owner did nothing but use the credit the other family put in and in time it was condemned and a fire trap -- what a mess. So taking the bull by the horns often results in not being gored.
I am goal oriented and always have been. I lost my husband this year after 53 fun filled years
ReplyDeleteto cancer. Now my goals have changed. I intend to do everything I always wanted to do, until I run out of good health. Then I will retire to Olympia, Washington to be near my youngest daughter. So far in my life I have made fate work for me not against me.
That chair and the fire sounds very cozy! It's a dreary wet day here, I'm hitting the couch for some movies.
ReplyDeleteGreat post, and I responded to HBFG's post about a similar topic this morning. I'm a little like her in respect of not having a lot of drive. I guess it depends on what it is, LOL! Sometimes I'm pretty happy live a small existence (I got that line from a movie.) I don't have to make a million dollars or be the top one at my workplace. I'm content in the simple things, love of family, owning a horse, finding a source for my creative outlet (blogging, crafts, writing.) I have some ideas and plans brewing in my head at all times, but I don't force goals upon myself, I prefer to leave what will be a bit to fate. That doesn't mean I'm a wandering around without a purpose, either! I just think letting go of having to live your life by goals makes the journey a little more interesting!
Cool, I started to feel a bit lonely in this, but now that Pony Girl left her comment and I feel better!
ReplyDelete*LOL*
I am goal oriented, but I like to think that fate also plays a big part in my life. Even if you have a goal, fate determines whether you will reach that goal. I think goals are good because they drive you to be the type of person that you are. For instance, a goal can be something as simple as making someone else smile.
ReplyDeleteBaby step Goals ...I like that! yet so important. Thanks for the comment Jill!
ReplyDeleteI'm willing to guess that for many of us a goal might be to pay a bill off by a certain date so we can catch up on those other large goals like getting a new garage or swimming pool.
ReplyDeleteI think everyday that I get up I have a goal, albiet unplanned...and that is to make it to the end of the day. Whatever I desire or set out to do at the very moment of waking becomes my goal at the moment I start the action to attain it. I have larger "fun" goals like visiting the world, and making certain things, but these in reality must wait until tomorrow...and until money and time allow. To me, setting these kinds of goals and working an overload of hours to achieve them is quite scary. Financial goals fall into the same boat, and sadly these kinds of goals can't be ignored until tomorrow.